By David Wong
David Wong has up-to-date the Lovecraft culture and infused it with humor that instead of lessening the horror, raises it dramatically. at any time when I set the ebook down down, i used to be cautious that whatever particularly used to be afoot, that there have been creatures I couldn't see, and that simply because I suspected this, i used to be subsequent. enticing, comedian, and terrifying.-- Joe Garden, Features Editor, The Onion
"Wong is sort of a mash-up of Douglass Adams and Stephen King... 'page-turner' is an understatement."--Don Coscarelli, director, Phantasm I-V, Bubba Ho-tep</I> "That rarest of things--a really frightening story."--David Wellington, author of <I>Monster Island, Vampire Zero "JOHN DIES on the finish has a cult following for a reason: it's bad, thought-provoking, and hilarious all at once. this is often probably the most interesting and addictive novels I've ever read."--Jacob Kier, writer, Permuted Press
STOP. You don't have touched this flyer together with your naked hands. NO, don't placed it down. It's too late. They're staring at you. My identify is David Wong. My ally is John. these names are faux. you need to switch yours. you'll now not need to know in regards to the issues you'll learn on those pages, approximately the sauce, approximately Korrok, concerning the invasion, and the longer term. yet it's too past due. You touched the ebook. You're within the video game. You're less than the eye. the one security is wisdom. you want to learn this e-book, to the tip. Even the half with the bratwurst. Why? you simply need to belief me.
The vital factor is this: The drug is named Soy Sauce and it provides clients a window into one other dimension. John and that i by no means had the opportunity to claim no. you continue to do. I'm sorry to have concerned you during this, i actually am. yet as you examine those poor occasions and the very dark epoch the realm is set to go into accordingly, it is important you retain something in mind: None of this used to be my fault.
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Additional resources for John Dies at the End
John! ” The thing gave chase, its shaved-ham feet slapping the floor behind me. My candle went out. I tossed it aside. I saw a closed door to my right, so I skidded to a stop, threw it open, and flung myself in. Linen shelves smacked me in the face and I fell back out of the closet, dazed. The meat man wrapped its cold links around my neck and lifted me up. It pinned me against the wall. “You disappoint me. All those times we have dueled. In the desert. In the city. ” I was so impressed by this thing’s ability to articulate words using that flapping deer tongue and a frozen turkey that I almost lost track of what it was saying.
My adopted family moved away, I won’t tell you where they are. But get out your pen because you’ll want to write this down. My biological mom? ” “That must have been hard. What was the—” “She was a strung-out, crank-addicted cannibal, dabbled in vampirism and shamanism. My mom, she worshipped some major devil when I was a toddler. Blew her welfare check every month on black candles. Sure, Satan would do her favors now and then, but there’s always a catch with the Devil. ” “No. This, this silliness, it’s what I do when I’m nervous.
I spun around, moved toward the commotion. The dog seemed to eye me carefully, then ran off in the other direction. I looked around— Ah. Giggling now. There was a bundle of girls, away from the stage, huddled with their backs to the band. They were surrounding a black guy with dreadlocks, an overcoat. He had one of those Rastafarian berets on his head, definitely going for a look, wanting the attention. Two of the girls had their hands over their mouths, eyes bulging, screaming for the guy to do it again, do it again.
John Dies at the End by David Wong